Selfish...am I?

Who am I…. What am I… I am tired of my self… completely tired… I don’t know what I want… or may be I never knew that… why I always try to be good…. Why I always try to keep every one…... why I cant let go… go and do what you want.. out of my life… I want to be alone… always… I m tired of people….. and hypocrisy… why I run from loneliness… when no body has any thing to offer to me…. In fact, do I have anything to offer… other than my silly talks….. useless laughter… shit pjs…. And loads of immature senti stuff… I don’t even know what people think of me…. May be a joker… who never has pain… no desires…. no ambitions…. Nothing…. Just laughs, in hope that world will laugh with him… world does but they forget as soon as he gets out of sight… no one cares about me… no one, the way I want…. no one cares for my feelings, emotions…. Everyone is busy with his/her life… infact why anyone should worry about me…. But then why I cant stop worrying about others… why why why why…. Why I cant be selfish… why I cant start thinking abt myself, MY feelings, MY life, MY desires, MY dreams, MY happiness…. WHY… WHY… WHY… WHY